


You Were Fine

by imhereguys



Category: Original Work
Genre: Depression, Original Character Death(s), Other, Sad Ending, life is a bitch and then you die, sorta neglect (implied)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 17:53:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8677189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imhereguys/pseuds/imhereguys
Summary: Your life was grey, you were alone, and you were fine.





	

The world looked grey to you.

The world always had looked grey to you. 

Ever since your mother held you for the first time, tired and worn out, looking vaguely disappointed at the empty chair next to the bed she was laying on. You were so small and new to the world, but she barely glanced at you, looking down at the chair with a blank stare.

Years went by, but little changed. You grew a little bigger, and your mother would comment on it, ruffling your hair while trying to smile at the face that looked so much like the one that left her. Her broken smile cut you as you tried to ignore it, and your world grew more washed out every second she looked at you.

You knew she meant well, but it was hard for someone to love well when they were so broken. Your mother tried so hard to love you well, but the edges of her broken smile still cut even when she didn't want it to.

You were fine though, you had others that helped with the burning stares and empty smiles. When it was too much you would run from the house, blindly in any direction. Somehow you would always end up at the park, and somehow they were always there.

They would wipe your tears away and soothe your hair back, tiny hands and tiny fingers petting your hair until you calmed down. You would smile and they would smile back, a crooked grin full of promises of fun times to come. You would slowing start to heal as you ran through the field, the grass became more green with every step, the sun became more bright with every laugh.

The world seemed fine, and you seemed to see more colour every time you stepped outside, but things were not meant to last, and children forgot.  
You knew they meant well, but it was hard for someone to understand you, as grey as your life was.

As you watched them play with others from under a tree in the park, you knew that yesterday the world had so much more colour.

When you stumbled into the house that night, your mother whispered to you over the table about the one who would make the world glow. She told you of a person who could heal all the broken edges, and the overwhelming greyness of the world. You scoffed at your mother, too broken from your day to do much else, and looked down at your plate. Your mother just scoffed back at your disbelief, and took a swig from the drink that she had taken to drinking recently.

A part of you ached for it to be true, but you could not afford to have the world be anymore grey. So, you crushed any hope you had in your body, and steeled yourself for the way life was going to be now. You were fine.

More years past and you grew more distant from your mother then you even  
were before. It happened so gradually, but one day you realized that you didn't even know if your mother was still alive. You sometimes wondered if she was fine, just like you were fine, but you thought of her in too short of a passing and never really got around to thinking too much about it.

You were fine, in your life made up of grey and numbness to emotion, but you still wondered about the person who would make your life glow in the way that your mother whispered about that night. When you lied in bed, not able to go to sleep, you would think of all that could be. After a little bit of thought you would think foolish, and fall asleep to the thought of seeing colour.

You stayed like this for a long time, and every year that past would make you grow more bitter, and the world more washed out. You knew that wanting to see colour again was useless, but that still did not stop you from feeling cold in its’ absence.

You were fine.

One day, you saw a flash of colour in your normal, washed out life. A streak of bluegold passed by you, and you froze. You reached out to grab the impossible, and you touched something. The person - itwasapersonohgod - turned around to face you, and smiled so wide and kind you almost cried. The world seemed to light up the more you stared at them.  
This was what your mother meant, whispering about someone who you never believed existed, trying to get you to understand. You fell to your knees, hand slipping from the hold it had on the bluegold, but you left it out reached, pointing to the most amazing creation you ever saw.

The bluegold only seemed understanding, gently kneeling in front of you, kind grin now a gentle smile. They grabbed your hand with their own and guided you up from the ground. Hand still with theirs, they started to show you the colour you were missing, and you could do no more than stare in wonderment at the greenblueyellowredorangepurple.

You were happy.

Nothing was better than the sense of together that they made you feel. For once in your life you felt like you belonged somewhere, someone wanted you. You knew that nothing was better than what they had given you in that moment.

You followed them around like a lost puppy, trailing behind them almost comically.

You spent all day with your bluegold and nothing could separate you from them. They just smiled, looking at you with a strange expression of amusement. You just stared, looking at them with a expression of confusion. You still  
could not understand what was happening, and why this took so long. You crushed that thought because you were happy, but it was always there, in the back of your mind.

You laughed more than you ever had before, seeming to almost fill the whole world with your giggles. You were reminded of the time in the beginning, with the others who left, but you quickly wiped away the thought. The bluegold was different, they were yours, just as you were theirs.

The days you spent together somehow made the world glow with the happiness that together you had. You almost thought that you could do anything together, that nothing would hurt you the way your mother was hurt. You finally understood the bitterness that your mother had felt, for a life without an other that glows for you, was one that you would not even want to imagine.

The more you thought about your mother, the more you thought of how your life was before. You looked close at the way your life is different now than before, and you started not to believe your eyes. How could someone be so close to you after all the time that no one would?

You started to think that this was a joke as you stared at your bluegold from across the table. You continued to stare even when they lifted their head up and stared right back at you, grin still present on their face. You thought that you might tell them what you are thinking. You thought that they might be able to fix you like they fixed your sight, make you believe and hope again.

But the moment passed and the spell is broken, and they glanced back towards their plate of food.

You were still staring.

You were fine.

You kept your thoughts inside your head even though they are almost bursting out with the amount that is in there. You can't say anything and you don't want to say anything, you told yourself. A part of you whispers you could, but you crushed it down like you crushed down the hope your mother gave you. You were fine.

You still had your colour, and you still had your bluegold, but something was different. You still ate and talked with your bluegold, and they still smiled at you, but something was wrong.

It was you, you realized. You were the one that was dampening the colour of them, you could see it in the way the air flowed less and less the more they walked with you. You could see the shimmer in the air fade the more you talked to them. Every time they smiled at you, you could see the power of their smile disappear.  
You were so used to staying by yourself that you had dragged the bluegold down to the grey world that you tried to leave. You knew that your mother had lied, you knew that you were fine before, so you knew you would be fine now.

They were starting to worry, you saw it in their eyes. The gentle smile hardened to a frown, and laughter stopped all together.

You knew you ruined this, and you knew you could do nothing to fix it, so you left.  
You left the bluegold and all the colour behind. Even as you took your first steps without them, you could see the colour drain from the world like a plug had been pulled up.

You were fine.

You were fine even as the world was greyer than you had ever seen before, even as you forgot what laughter even was. 

You knew you did the only action that would save the bluegold, the only action that would preserve the glow that you once were a part of.

You crushed any part of yourself that whispered go back, for you knew that that would ruin everything you tried to fix.You did what you had to do and you were fine.

You were fine even as you lied on your deathbed, cold and alone.

You were fine even as you took your last breaths, and you did not wish that maybe things would have been better if you had stayed.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I just has this idea of a sad ending story and this is what came to be. If you have anything advice for me I'd appreciate it!


End file.
